She's so potty!

We're on the potty adventure! My youngest daughter (Kalina) is on her way to becoming diaper free and this mama is so excited to almost ditch the diapers.  Since she is the third child I consider myself seasoned and confident about how to 'train' her but this little one has ideas of her own.  For starters, she insisted on relocating her potty seat to the living room.  To be exact, right in front of the television.  Okay, okay, so she's enthusiastic about doing her potty needs but she can't miss out on watching Dora or Olivia.  Nope, she's not gonna have it.  So I had to make a compromise with her.

Me: "Kalina, mommy can't have your potty seat in front of the T.V. baby."

Kalina: "Oh no!"

Me: "Can we put it right over here in this corner?" (away from the T.V. closer to the dining room table)

Kalina: "No, no, no!"

Me: "Please baby?  Look I'll put your books here too!"

Kalina: "O-tay Mommy.  Ka-ina pee-pee in potty he-a"

Me: "Thank you tee-tee!"

Kalina: "O-tay Mommy."

She's happy with her potty seat in the 'middle' section and so it this mama.  As soon as she's done doing her stuff she's able to quickly waddle over with her panty and pants down to her knees and not miss too much of her favorite show.  It's kinda cute!

Trick or Treat or Share- How my kids gave back

Halloween is one of the most anticipated holiday's for most kids (and in our house).  For this mama here, it rings more to "sugar, hyper-kids and cavities, oh my!"  But not to fret because I had a secret plan.  I barely broached the issue of all the addictive, sticky, high fructose filled candy and chocolate that would soon pile onto my dining room table because I told my sweet little darlings that they would be getting all the candy that their teeny fist sized hearts desired.

Me: "Girls, we're going to get tons of candy this year!"

Girls: "Yay!!" (in unison).

Sabrina: "Mommy, can we eat the candy?"

Me: "Of course you can. But only a few."

Luna: "But why, Mommy?"

Me: "Don't worry, you'll be able to eat some of it."

Sabrina: "But we want to eat it all!"

Me: "Okay, okay girls, don't worry you're going to get lot's and lot's of candy!"

Pouting and confused, they went along with what I was telling them.

Off we went 'trick or treating',  one dressed as a 'Gypsy', another as 'Alice' and the third as a 'Hula Girl'.  Mommy went as 'Little Red Riding Hood' and Daddy went as 'Zorro'.  They loved that we dressed up with them and they loved it even more when we told them that they could break into their 'loot' while they bounced up and down the sidewalks and driveways collecting all that candy.

Luna: "Mommy, can I have another chocolate?"

Me: "Yes!"

Her eyes sparkled as if my face were a fourth of July explosion.  


We treated around a neighborhood with an enormous golf course for a view (amazing!) and the girls got lot's and lot's of candy.  By the time that we got half way around the one mile rotunda, the baby, Kalina (2 years is still a baby in my eyes) plopped herself in her stroller and helped herself to her candy and chocolate chip cookies someone had given her as loot.  By the time we got back to the car, Kalina's face looked as if she had smooched with the Cookie Monster (it was kinda cute!).

Sabrina: "Mommy, we got soooooooo much candy!!!"

Me: "I know, I can see!"

Luna: "Can we eat it all?"

Me: "I have a better idea."

The girls: "What?"

Me: "Why don't we go home and dump all this candy into our BIG Halloween bowl and then give it out to the trick or treaters that come to our door?"

Silence.  I waited to see what they thought.  I expected the big tantrum and all the reasons why they needed to keep their candy that they trick or treated for and yada, yada, yada... Instead, I got:


The girls: "YES!!"

Sabrina: "That's a great idea Mom!"

Luna: "Yes, I want to give away all my chocolate because I don't want to go to the dentist later."

I was happily shocked and excited that in spite of all the candy loving that goes on around here and I'm sure elsewhere, they were willing to give it all back and share with other kids.  


So when we got home, we put on Halloween music, they danced around the dining room table and couldn't wait to have their own trick or treaters to give to.  When the doorbell rang and the dog started to yap away, the girls were squealing all the way to the door and gave handfuls of candy to about thirty trick or treaters (collectively).  It was so much fun for them, I loved that all that candy was out of the house and the best part, I didn't spend a dime on candy this year ;)  It was a win win!

On to the next holiday!!

Heads or tails?

Today was just one of those 'do I have to really do this, again?' days.

I'm groggy and I haven't placed my feet on the cold floor yet and I'm already getting the "Mommy, nurse!" request from Little Miss K beside me (while she pokes at my boob-Ouch!).  Then Luna slowly creeps into my bedroom whispering to me "Mommy, Sabrina has something on her pillow!"  I'm up and out of bed in two seconds flat.  I discover that there are blood splotches all over Sabrina's pillow.

I don't panic (Investigator Mama mode is on).

I check her nose.  Nothing.  I check her ears.  Nothing.  I check her head.  Nada! What the hell?? 

Then...

Ah-ha!

The cause?  A loose tooth and her night time thumb sucking.  How did I know?  I don't know? (Moms are just cool that way).  Mystery solved and the victim didn't care either way.  

Then came the two, three, four, and five time requests of: "Go pee", "Take off your P.J's", "Brush your teeth", and "Get dressed"

Patience?  Next to zero this morning.  

Little confession. I haven't showered in two days (yes, I did change my underpants-I'm not that gross, geese!).  Does a washcloth with lavender oil sprinkled on it count as a pseudo-shower?  

Come on, that was the best I could do! 

  

In between figuring out what each one wants for breakfast (one PB& J sandwich and two bowls of vanilla goat yogurt), 'Handy Manny' blaring on the tube, the dog asking for food, re-braiding each of their hair, packing their lunch boxes, chasing the little one around the house to get her droopy diaper off, and a head to toe 'full water' shower for me (whoo-hoo!), we're out the door, FINALLY.  

My new motto: Parenting: Showers optional (sometimes not possible).  

The girls get to school past 10am (thank goodness it's a quaint laid back school) and I'm off to Target with Little Miss K.  

Now what comes next my friends was the "Who the hell am I to complain about MY life today" moment:

After doing my Target shopping I get in line to pay and start putting my things on the conveyer belt.  Little Miss K is happily entertained with a LeapFrog laptop toy (I had no intention on buying it for her-it simply bought me 'tantrum free' time-Evil!).  Then I hear these strange grunts and squeals coming from one register across from me.  I inconspicuously look over and see a fairly young woman (40ish) and her son. The sounds were coming from him.  He is her disabled child.  He starts to give her a mini tantrum while she is standing in line to pay.  He's trying to take his shirt off.  She's gently explaining to him that he can't.  He doesn't understand.  He's frustrated.  She's is calm.  She is confident.  People are looking.  My heart is sinking.   My little one is still quietly entertained (thankfully).  Her exchange with her son went something like this:

Mother: "Come on, let's go.  Walk ahead."

Son: (grunts, moans).

Mother:  "Oliver, come with Mom.  Come help me push the buttons to pay."

The cashier says 'hello' to Oliver.

Mother: "Say 'hello' Oliver."

Son: (grunts).

Mother (to the cashier):  "He's fifteen.  He likes to help push these buttons on the key pad with me."

Turns to her son.

"Right, Oliver?"

The love and patience for her son poured out of her like a cascade of flowers.  I wanted to hug her and tell her how amazing she was.  

Today is the day that all my woes seem like nothing next to this amazing Mom (Oliver's Mom).  Today is the day that I am humbled by this mother's strength, love, compassion and patience.  Today is the day that I say with an open heart, "Hats off to EVERY parent out there with a special needs child-no matter the severity" because these parents have it two hundred zillions times harder than we with 'normal' children do.  Oliver's Mother cannot roll out of bed care-free today or any day.  She is a parent in high demand, no exceptions.  She chooses to mother in awareness and love.  I choose the same things for my children too but sometimes (actually, a lot of times) I fall off the bandwagon and get caught up with my own shit and lose sight of what really matters.  Then there are moments when another person's reality places your feet back on the ground and jolts you back from stupidity.  Today was my day.  

When we choose to have a child, it's a gamble.  Heads or tails?  Who knows? We don't know what we're going to get but when our heart and soul is in it 'unconditionally', no matter what the outcome, circumstance or situation is bestowed upon us, that is when you get to experience or witness the true act of being SELFLESS.  

The case for the butterfly net

Meet my daughter, Luna.  Birth order: middle child.  Age: 5.  Disposition: cautious but clever.  Her theory on butterfly nets?  Find out here:

Me: "Luna, I can't walk though this living room without tripping on all these toys. I asked you three times already, PICK THEM UP!" (my nose is flaring at this point).

Luna: "Okay, okay, Mom! I will, I will!"

I leave the living room and go sit at my desk to contemplate the stack of bills we have yet 'to pay.'
Sabrina walks over.


Sabrina:  "Mom, can you charge my iPod?"

Me: "Okay, in a sec."

Sabrina: "Mom, please do it now cause you always say in a sec and then don't do it?"

Me: "Uggghhh...Okay!"


Sabrina leaves and within minutes, along comes Luna.


Luna: "Mommy, I have a surprise!"

Me: "Okay, what is it?"

Luna: "Look over there." (she points to the living room)

Me: "Wow, you picked up all the toys!"

Luna: "Yes, I did!"

Me: "How did you do it so fast?"

Luna: "I used a butterfly net."

There you have it.  So, according to Luna, butterfly nets are not just for catching butterflies.  Go figure!