Gratitude and following my heart

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One of the things that I've often felt compelled to share here are the memories of my childhood that inevitably intertwine with my mothering.

I'm constantly peeling away the layers of scabs that allow me to heal and that ultimately permit me to mother my three sweet daughters in the ways that I myself dreamt of being mothered.  

One might say that it's a form of therapy.  I'd agree.

I have much to be grateful for.  Becoming a mother has been the cornerstone in allowing me to face and sit with the sometimes unpleasant and oftentimes painful events from my past.  Ignoring it would be foolish of me.  Pain comes with growth.  Becoming aware takes time.  I am solely responsible for my actions.  Overall, I am grateful for being able to love and mother my daughters as I do.

Love is a road we all trek down and sometimes we stumble upon rocks that leave us bruised and scraped.  The most painful ones often intersect at a very young and impressionable age (at least for me.)  Sometimes not for others.  But still, love is unrelenting and the heart, when followed, is full of gratitude for the chances at loving and being loved...again.  

Nothing is ever single facetted.  Life is complicated.  People are complicated.  Moments are gone so quickly.  The feeling always remains.  

The crevices of my world hold nuggets of time and people and places.  Because my life was threatened at a very young age, I've learned to be grateful for the mundane things that truly make me happy and to always find some form of solace in simple pleasures.

Each time I sit to collect my thoughts, fears, dreams or joys and record them here, on this blog, I'm following my heart.  You see, my writing IS my life line.  Stringing my words together to form the  thoughts that make up my emotions is like peeking into my heart.

I love big.  I dream often.  I am full of gratitude.  I write from a place from within that I've always known existed but was too afraid to give a voice to.

My children are often my muse.  My husband is my constant.  My family are the link to my past, present and future and for this I am grateful.

I don't know what else this life will hand over but what I do know for sure is that I'm following my heart, am full of gratitude and there is nothing wrong with that.