Parenting. It brings about a whirlwind of positives and negatives.
Sometimes the negatives can really be a let down (no, not breast milk.)
I love my children, but after having three, there have been moments where
I literally want to yank my hair out. No. Joke.
Yes, I know, it comes with the territory but sometimes these moments call for a nice
glass of ANY red wine or white wine because frankly, I like my hair.
Here are my top 5 down sides to parenting (in no particular order.)
1. Potty Panic...
You're finally out the door and on your way to that way overdue grocery shopping. You can't take another day of canned sardines. You look through your rear view mirror and are happy to see your beautiful children smiling and carrying on in their car seats when out of the
wee corner of the backseat you hear, "I have to go pee!"
THIS is what I call 'potty panic', yes,
because this shit puts me in a friggin' frenzy.
Of course, I end up asking the same stupid question of,
'WHY didn't you go BEFORE we left the house??" (nose flaring and buggy eyed)
Which of course the answer is ALWAYS "I didn't have to go before."
Makes me want to just have them pee themselves. Ugh.
2. Sibling Bickering...
There is nothing worse than trying to intervene in my children's bickering. I don't know if it's a girl thing but their level of loudness is way too much on the ear drums. They. Are. Loud.
"StopitnowbecauseotherwiseI'mnotgoingtogetyouthatwhateverthingyouwanted!"
Is what I sound like.
3. Brushing Battles...
I can probably play an entire game of 'Words with Friends' with the many times
I have to ask the girls to "go brush your teeth."
What is it with kids and not wanting to go brush their teeth when their asked?
I don't get it. It's like, pulling teeth!
4. The Nighttime Thirst
It never fails to happen, this one.
You tuck them in bed, give them their hugs and kisses,
tell them how much you love them
and wish them 'sweet dreams.'
You leave the room door ajar and finally go and plop yourself on the couch next to
your partner, significant other or your cat or dog. You choose a flick or TV show, you exhale in exhaustion and then a little voice calls out, "I'm thirsty!"
What the F*ck??
5. Fried Brain...
I give you, your NEW brain.
This is your brain on PARENTING because no matter what we say or do
or don't say or don't do, the results are the same. We. Feel. Completely. Fried.
Sunny side up, anyone?
The End.
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